Olympic legend Joachim DeRipa won the men’s 100 metres final in a record time of 9.54 seconds. Tremendous applause followed the inspirational athlete as he made his way to the winners’ podium.

Half a world away, Inspector P.J. (‘Me Darlin’) Murphy was watching on TV in his home in London. It was his day off, and he was tired.

He speed-dialled Scotland Yard and while DeRipa was still holding his medal aloft and waving to the crowd, he was hustled to the ground, handcuffed and immobilised by six burly lawmen.

‘You can run but you can’t hide, me darlin’, said Murphy, as he watched from his favourite armchair.



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