Three fat ladies came to see me,
to convert me to the Lord.
If I looked like any one of them,
I too would be distraught.
Sr Agnes is the fattest,
she has dimples in her cheeks.
The other two would need a sauce
— serve with ham and leeks.
I said I’d sign up for a month,
then take it as it comes.
If he hasn’t done the trick by then,
I’ll have me three fat nuns.