If you’re feeling peckish
but you don’t have time to eat,
try wearing Danish bacon
on the soles of your feet.
You may feel slightly foolish
when you’re walking in the street,
but your hunger pangs will vanish
like doorsteps under sleet.
There may be other steps involved,
but I’ve given you the gist.
I can’t remember everything
when I’m completely inebriated.